Time Wounds All Heals, And I May Be It This Time, So This Round To You But The Game Is Far From Over

I watched The US vs. John Lennon last night. Good flick. I admit I don't know that much about him, never having dove headfirst into Beatlemania, but it seems he had a bit of a Messiah Complex. Which, hey, good job, I say. If more people had Messiah Complexes, and weren't, you know, sociopathic, but went around getting millions of people to chant things like "All we are saying, is give peace a chance", I might have more hope for humanity. Anyway, the movie focused on the part of John's life where he evolves from a moptop into a political activist, and the US government's attempts, under Nixon and Hoover, to intimidate and have him deported.

As an aside, one thing that struck me in this movie were the bits of Government propaganda used to support the Vietnam War in those days, and how similar... no, how identical they were to our present day Nixonish regime's propaganda. Lord, we need another Messiah!

One thing that troubled me about the whole incident was something G. Gordon Liddy said in the film. John Lennon was a British citizen, living in New York under a visitor's visa. It galled G. that a foreigner, who loved living in the US and enjoying the freedoms that our National forefathers provided would dare to criticize the US war policy. "If you don't like it, go back to Britain", was the sentiment. And, as anti-US policy as I am, it sounds like a good point. As a US citizen, it would be supremely galling of me to go hang out in London and criticize the Blair administration for it's part in the Iraq war, wouldn't you agree?

Where it breaks down is here. The favorite Republican slogan, said off-camera, of "Shut up, or get out" is so twisted and unAmerican that anyone who says it and believes it, and even worse uses it as a policy making idea, ought to be the ones that get bitchslapped. I feel that, something that is often not thought about in those circles is that America was not a nation founded on religion, or borders, or policy. It was founded on ideas of equality and human rights, regardless of where you come from or who you worship or what kind of hat you hang on your coatrack in the evenings, and as such should be able to stand up to the critical eye of truth, or survive the attacks of lies, whichever Nation the mouthpiece hails from. Obviously, America failed that test in Vietnam, and we are woefully failing it again in Iraq. When the powers that be try to silence people, regardless of their citizenship, it means that they're scared. George Bush isn't scared, which means that Peace & Love and all that hippie malarky has no champion this time around.

Okay, getting off my high horse now, whom I've named Lennon.

Well, I've been "tagged" by Miss Luongo, and when such an august persona as she tells you to write something, you do not decline. I have been told that I must blog about my answers to the questions in the following category: Things I Know By Heart. Before I continue, I feel I must offer the disclaimer that although this rather feels like one of those emails you get with a list of half-questions such as: Favorite Color? Most Embarassing Moment? Second Favorite Movie? etc... and you answer them and reply to everyone on the mailing list, additionally sending it to five new friends, who in turn have to answer, it is not. One of those emails, I mean. First off, it's not an email. It's a "tag you're it!" blog game. Secondly, I was tagged under the geas of Buffy the Vampire Slayer metaphors, and seeing as I'm such a starstruck fanboy when it comes to Buffy, I must oblige. It's like when religious people invoke their deity. God told me to do it, amen! Well, Buffy has commanded me, via her latest acolyte Miss Luongo, and the power of the Slayer compels me.

Man, sometimes when I write things, I realize how lost a cause I really am. Anyway, moving on.

Things I Know By Heart:
Two Novels/Poems/Plays: What am I, Abraham Lincoln? When I was in the sixth grade I was in a play called Snow White and the Six Dwarves. There were only six because Smiley went to Hollywood to do toothpaste commercials. It was a stupid play. But I knew my lines by heart, does that count? I hate poetry. It seems to me that poetry is a cheap economical affected way of saying things in a misleading manner. Say what you mean, dammit! I understand that it's all supposed to be pretty, and in the old days a good way to make chicks weak in the knees. But, give me a good novel any day. I don't know any novels by heart though, that's ridiculous. So...

Love guppy

			You mean all the world to me.
			Without you I can't be free.
			You make me pant considerably.
			You're my love guppy.

			You have the finest rosebud's taste.
			Without you my life is waste,
			I'll stick to you like Elmer's paste.
			You're my love guppy.

			I'd break through a citadel.
			I'd fight with a raging bull, 
			Though winning would seem improbable.
			You're my love guppy.

			My love's as strong as the mid-ocean ridge.
			You shine like the rainbow bridge
			or like that light inside my fridge.
			You're my love guppy.

			For you I'd consume haggis,
			or lose the joys of Bacchus,
			or live in sin with Mike Dukakis.
			You're my love guppy.

			No time's too long for me to wait.
			For you, I'd fight against Fate,
			though maybe you could lose some weight,
			You're my love guppy.

			Without you, I'd be not whole,
			I would have to sell my soul,
			or gulp a quart of Tide-E-Bowl.
			You're my love guppy.

			My passion is always mounting.
			I'm like a geyser founting.
			Well, maybe not, but who's counting?
			You're my love guppy.

			The love that is the more intense
			always has the most silence,
			like quiet bursts of flatulence.
			You're my love guppy.

			I know that my love is true.
			I know that you'll love me too,
			or I'll hold my breath 'till I turn blue
			You're my love guppy.

			I'd not forget you if I tried.
			You make me all warm inside.
			My love's as pure as Naugahyde.
			You're my love guppy.

			Then I hear the words let slip
			From betwixt impatient lips,
			"I want to have a relationship.
			You're my love guppy."

So I don't actually have it memorized, but that's poetry!

Two Films/Television Shows You Can Quote From:  Well that's easy. The Kids in the Hall. The funniest show ever made, and I quote from it on a daily basis. If not out loud, then at least in my head, because if there isn't someone else around who knows the show as well as I do, it's not funny. For instance: "Well I think the great leader is some sort of twisted ass freak!" Or, "I'm crushing your head!" Or, "I'm not being sarcastic." And, not to be too obvious or anything, but you had to see it coming. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Cordelia: "So, does looking at guns really want to make you have sex?" Xander: "I'm 17. Looking at linoleum makes me want to have sex."

Two Songs To Which You Know Every Word: Actually, I have a real problem with this. I don't know any words to any songs... at least, you know, not if the song is not playing at the moment so I can kind of stumble along with it, and that's only if I am extremely familiar with the music already. It's a serious mental block. I'm sure it has something to do with my disdain of poetry. When there's music on, I don't actually really ever pay attention to the words, which shocks my friends to no end. But, like I tell them, it's the music I care about, not the wooing of women by post-pubescent songwriters. Even when I really like the lyrics to something, I never commit them to memory. But having said all that, Scott, being so distressed over my handicap, saw his solemn duty as my best friend to teach me a song, and after days of practicing, (I'm not joking. Days.) I got this one down:

Show me the way to go home. I'm tired and I want to go to bed. I had a little drink about an hour ago, and it went straight to my head! -From JAWS.

Two Dishes You Can Make Without A Recipe: My Mom's special cheesecake, and tacos. If I buy the kind that come in that little yellow box.

Two Cities You Can Navigate Without A Map: I'm going to take this opportunity to be snotty about how well-travelled I am. Munich, Germany. Because I lived within an hour of it for six years and it's actually one of my top 2 favorite cities in the world. I spent alot of time there. The Hauptbahnhof (main train station) is one of my favorite parts of the city and makes a great starting point.
And while it may seem boastful considering what a maze the place is, but Venice. Because it's also one of my top 2 favorite cities and I've been there about 7 times, and because I know all of the major points and I don't mind wandering around it's back alleys lost for a few hours until stumbling upon a place I know. Actually, that's one of the most pleasurable activities in Venice. The other is riding the vaporetti (boat buses) around all day. San Marco piazza is sublime, too.

By the way, if anybody needs a personal tour guide, you know, I am totally for hire. For those two cities, or any other place I've been. Or not been. I'm really good at travelling.

And An Extra Question–What’s A Date You Always Remember, and What’s A Date You Always Forget?: This is the silliest question and reminds me more of those emails I was talking about than the other questions. But, the power of the Slayer compels me regardless, so, I always remember Christmas, because even if for some reason I didn't want to, the retail community makes sure that I don't. And I don't know of any dates I've forgotten, otherwise they wouldn't count as answers to this question, would they then? That was a very British answer in honor of John Lennon. Peace out.

Here's a picture of me in Prague which I thought of posting here because of the inherent personality-typing implicit in the tag questions. It's supposed to be mildly snarky. Probably it's narcissitic. Damn you, Myers-Briggs!

Comments

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Okay, the green has faded. I'm better now.

I don't know you well enough to call you goofy-looking in the picture. I'll take Julie's word on it. But now that I've taken a closer look, you do look a little.....well, I'll just leave it at that and go visit your flight suit photos to cleanse my pallet.

[Heather]

"Goofy" is code for "hot". Everyone knows this.

[messiestobjects]

And "hot" is code for "disposable". Only I know this, but I pass this knowledge on to the world.

[Heather]

No one let him get away with that. I'm begging you. Ladies?

[Heather]

Christy? Someone deflate him ASAP.

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

McPick, only you know of this secret because you are disposable? So we can dispose of you? Because I'm sure you are not referring to any of us "goofy" people. (clearly not feeling Shakespear tonight...)

Since Jenn is not here, I feel the need to the take the liberty of noting that we have pushed the 50 mark.

[messiestobjects]

Yeah... I'm not sure what Heather's getting all panicky about. I'm pretty sure I just did a job of self-deflation there. I'm just saying, you know, hotness equates with shallowness equates with disposability...

By now you should realize that I don't really know what I'm talking about. I make it up as I go, and when girls start calling me hot I get all flustery and say stupid things. So. You know. Knock it off you crazy posse.

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Hottie, hottie, hottie.

Har! Har! Flustered?

Seriously, I agree with the hot thing in terms of plastic people and Barbie dolls. People who love their outsides have not taken the time to care for their insides. Oh, they're hot all right. Hot like an air balloon.

I am pleased to report that my friends and acquaintances regularly harass me about my daily unkempt appearance and lack of personal hygiene. I used to get away with this behavior by referring to myself as a hippie chick. At 36, I can no longer slide on the hippie stigma. Now, I am just a dirty girl. But, hey! At least I'm not a hottie! Can't beat that!

[Gary]

I don't know what you people are talking about. Being hot is the best thing you can be.

[Heather]

My bad. I thought you were trying to call Julie disposable when everyone knows the only thing that's going to be around after nuclear winter is Julie's blog. I get the confused; I blame the green background. Your disposability is unparalleled, of course; have you tried standing outside her house with a boombox? I must have missed something without the miracle cure-all tonic that is Sanka. I'm so ashamed. Please. Carry on.

[Heather]

Saranne, you damn dirty hippie. Remind me to show you my own version of "poet-in-a-do-rag". It's fantastic.

[spanky]

I am honored to be a goofy guppy. which is 10 times better than being a goofy whale, which is what i resemble more than a guppy.

so far as being hot...well what can i say..genetics did not give me much to work with, but Id like to think I have a hot mind. if there can be such a thing. so far as my body being hot? Um no. not at all.

Thanks for giving me a nickname..i know someone is jealous but since i never know who is leaving what comment due to your blog format i think it is either julie or sara. either way, others jealouy makes me gleem with happiness.

thanks.

YOur loyal Guppster.

also, i am not drunk. i just take alot of sudafed.

[spanky]

upon reading the prior comments again, i see i am not a goofy guppy but a drunk one. even better. also, my sister sara is flirting with you and it is SHAMEFUL I TELL YOU.....

sara you should be filled with hot shame for coveting michael in his pant suits or whatever.

[Miss Luongo]

I'm not sure how I got tied up in the hotness mix, but Iam(bic) hot (snork - that's my word-dork laugh).

I don't like to use the word hot because it's Scare-us Hilton's and I don't mimick the deeply stupid. It's not nice.

And we're all disposable. Not alot of us. Not even a lot of us. But the lot of us.

[spanky]

I consider myself rather cake-ish

[messiestobjects]

The fact that all of us are spending the greater portions of our days trying to make each other laugh by making silly comments on each other's blogs kind of makes us dorks, actually.

Dorks are not hot, even if by some freak of nature they're physically attractive.

[spanky]

I reek of dork. but here is what I know for sure...i may not be a a hottie tottie...but like Ron white says...you cant fix stupid. so all the pretty people...if they are dull and dumb...well pretty only goes so far and after that...well there is dorks like me. and i like being s dork. with other dorks flocking around me.

[Heather]

I Brake for Dorks.

[spanky]

heather I am just impressed that you brake at all. You seem like a pedal to the metal kinda gal. and that isnt bad. im just glad youll brake for me since i dont like to run in public. looks bad. real bad.

[wolfboy]

Here's to swimmin' with bowlegged women!

[Heather]

Running in public is for losers, and as we have already established, we are D-O-R-K-S. But personally, dweeby boys really are my favorite.

[spanky]

dork boys are fab.

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Gary, again, I expect nothing less of you.

Wolfboy, who you callin' bowlegged?

Julie, you are the exception to the hot rule. You've got good outsides. Good insides. Good natured. I'm sure you have other problems in life...(I'm feeling the green. LOL)

Heather, bring on your poet-in-a-do-rag.

Spanky, I LOVE RUNNING IN PUBLIC! And leaping, too. I do a lot of public leaping and cartwheeling.

Michael, I spent most of my life posing as a dork. I've recently come out of the closet as the coolest person anyone has ever met. (no one is going to fall for that, are they?)

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

This is number 74. I think we can make it to 100. If I were a cheerleader or a songwriter, I'd put a little ditty together in the name of motivation to 100. Heather?

Of course I'm a dork. Who else would write something like this? I give myself E for effort. And D for dork.

[Heather]

I don't know, Cap'n Sarannemeter. I'm all tuckered out from the hellz-a-blazin' work I did today. But I'll see if anything's lurking down there and report back... For the love of God, people, I'm an ARTISTE! I can't be made to perform on demand! Wait, what? Oh, yeah. Never mind.

[Kris]

Does any body really know what a dork is? My daughter does, she thinks I am since Buffy is my hero too. But thanks to Michael I don't stand alone. And for the record I like to think of myself as being a "COOL DORK"

[messiestobjects]

Now now everyone... unlike our dear friend Miss Luongo's blog, this blog thrives on it's commenters making serious thoughtful additions to the conversation, rather than devolutions into lesbianism or comment counting. It's about quality people, not quantity!

... aw hell. I can't even fool myself. Tell you what Iambic Sarannemeter... I'll believe that you're the coolest person ever if you'll buy my highbrow posing nonsense... everyone else, carry on as normal.

[Heather]

Oooh! Buy it! Buy it! "Let's see what happens when we replace our regular Mike with Folgers Crystals..."

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

OMG! Heather! I just choked on a yellow pepper over replacing Michael with Folgers Crystals. You slay me! I will take note not to eat while reading Heather's comments.

Okay, now onto some business. First of all, Michael - GOOD GOD! - don't do that to me! I totally thought you were serious about the ramming around on your blog. I was reading line for line and getting that tingly uncomfortable, I've-done-a-very-bad-thing feeling. Whew!

Next, I am so buying your line of crap. You are all highbrow from where I'm standing and let's just keep it that way so that I keep on bein' my cool self over here.

Kris, I agree with you on cool dork. And the more I think about it, because I have some time to kill, the more I define a dork as someone who is not afraid to exhibit their defects of character in a public setting. Which still makes me cool. I'll have to work on that. And my seething hatred. And smoking. And over-reacting. And my jealousy.

Wait a minute....hang on.

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Ok, I'm back. I just wanted to rack up the tally.

I will laugh over Folgers Crystals for a week, Heather!!!!!!!!!!

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

[messiestobjects]

Yeah, laugh it up, fuzzballs. You know what happens when you replace me with Folgers Crystals? You get a shitty instant coffee caffeine buzz and no highbrow dork blog to make fun of. So there.

[Heather]

Hmm, yes. That could be bad. But you love it. You're wearing your flight suit right now, I bet. Flexing in the mirror... "Lookit me! I'm a rocket man!"

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Yo, you're the one who called yourself disposable, Rocket Boy. There's no need for idle threats. Now, step away from the flight suit and have a cup of Sanka.

(ssssppppptttt...Heather, I'm out on the Folgers test. He's right. Coffee can't blog and this is the only place I get to be a pretend cool person. Too much is at stake. Sorry, babe.)

[Miss Luongo]

Saranne, I don't have problems. Girl, it's a charmed life. Nothing can touch me. I'm golden girl. Living the dream, I am. Thanks for checking.

[spanky]

"replacing mike with folgers crystals"

WILL BE FUCKING FUNNY FOREVEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

THAT WAS THE SHIT.

laughed out loud I did.

all the making fun we do mike is just further evidence that we like you and need to vbring your down to our infantile level so that we are more comfortable with our own inner and outter dork.

[SaranneFosselmanMiller]

Yes, yes, Julie. I know. I shall continue to dwell in your shadow of elite perfection. You could have lied, you know. Just to make the rest of feel better.

Spanky, did you just call Michael an infant? If we have to bring him down from that level to boost our own self-esteems, I am concerned with my well-being.

"Push it, push it real good...." - That's my cheer/song to get to 100. This is like running up hill through molasses. Must go to work. Be back at one. I call dibs on number 100! Shotgun!

[Heather]

Puh-LEEZE. Mike could never be replaced and he knows it. BUT! That doesn't mean we have to do his bidding. Well, you can. Me? I'm busy. I've got very important people to meet and very important places to be. Sheeeeit.

[spanky]

the song "push it" i think...is about sex...could be wrong, but i dont think it is fitting for the blog a thon weve got going here.

heather has important places to be abd people to see...meanwhile i hide in the bathroom part of the day and the other half "walk arounf carring papers with a worried look on my face" like constanza.

slacker of all slackers. I may be the queen of slack.

[Gary]

spam-ky is a subgenius and doesn't even realize it.

[spanky]

who is spam-ky...is this like a spin off show, only it is a spin off person...spanky and her friend spam-ky

or are you just suggesting i am idiot savant. i get that alot.

[Gary]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Church_of_the_SubGenius#Slack

[spanky]

I am mad you have associated my good spank name with some wierdo beatnick "church"

[spanky]

although i can see how you came to the conclusion that i am a member.

[Gary]

I take it back.

[spanky]

really? YOu do? because that makes me forgive you a little

[spanky]

actually i am a little sensetive today..forgive my hostility.

[Heather]

OK. About the "important" part? Totally lying. I thought that'd be obvious: I's a yarn-spinner. Though my annual review is coming up, and they've got me chained to the radiator in here. HELP! Motherty f*cket. In other news, I want the name "spam-ky" so I can be the sidekick you deserve! Maybe "Hamky".

[Heather]

Alright. I'm under the wire. If you don't know the tune to this, I can't help you.

THE COMMENTER'S SONG
Ooooooooooooh, Cousin Dan was a real man’s man who was very rarely stable.
And Pegger, Miss Pegger was a boozy beggar who could blog you under the table.
Gary D. could out-type me and Vinny Barbarino.
And Sarannemeter was a wordy hoo-er who was just as sloshed as Dino.
It’s said that Julie couldn’t school ye on the trauma to your wrists.
Spankity, herself, is permanently pissed…

Matt Lesoine, purveyor of poyn, after half a day of blogging was in rarest form. KC, they say, could stick it away, half a crate of comments every day!
Dooner, Jenn and Cordy were buggers for the shortie,
And Christy was fond of her nip.
And Mike the Rogue was a drunken pogue :
"I blog, therefore I slip."

Yes, Spankity herself is particularly missed;
A lovely little blogger, but a bugger when she's pissed.

[spanky]

i wanty you to be known ffrom this point on as Hanky (heather+spanky) sister of the the ellusiver butt clencher Spankey the great.

yep it is settled now.

[spanky]

oh that was just beautiful.

and your right. I am just no fun when i am pissed. Lucky for everyone i had cheesestix for lunch (happy happpy) and discussed at great length the legacy and the myth of the "shifty eye"

shiftiness is one of my favorite topics. those in life unable to make eye contact are subject to my shifty finger. it is a magic finger that can dertermine all things shifty. it was a power given to me after a freak electric storm/car accident typhoon.

anyway one of my alias's is the SHIFTONATER

so why do i like shifty so much? well i was discussing a co workers husband who goes tot he methadone clinic everyday because he was in jail for 6 years due to a crack addiction that caused him to rob the same bank twice. they caught him the second time. anyway....he is the poster man of shifty.

and i love it.