Seattle; City Of Science Fiction And Improper Diction

"When I die, I'm donating my body to science fiction."
-Steven Wright

"The future isn't what it used to be."
-Arthur C. Clarke

It's my 200th post! So in honor of this rather meaningless milestone, I traveled all the way out to Washington state just to get this photo of the Space Needle. Well ok, I was forced to be in Seattle for work, but I made the best of a bad situation and toured around the city a bit, and spent some time with Jordan and Alison, friends of mine who live in the area whom I'd known from Germany. Jordan is famous for his dance moves at the Bavarian Biker Fest (and has the neck-scars to prove it!) and Alison is famous for her drunken instigation of little Danish hot dog fights. Also I got to see Emily, another friend from Germany, who was in the area on rather suspicious business one afternoon and who is famous for breaking T-bars over fellow snowboarder's heads in fits of amazing pique. Ah good times, good times.

Anyway, Seattle is a very cool city, although I must say that I'm very disappointed to not have seen one single flannel the entire time I was there! Very sad. It's almost as if, collectively, it is a city ashamed of it's grungy flash in the pan. The absolute COOLEST part of the city, without a doubt, and I'm sure you already know what I'm going to say because it's the coolest thing in the universe (that we know of) and it's in Seattle so of course you know where I'm going; is the Science Fiction Museum.

I was soooooo happy when I realized this place existed, and that I was in Seattle to experience it. This museum kicked so much butt. You weren't allowed to take photos inside, which really really frustrated me. Here I was, in the coolest museum I'd ever been in... and I was impotent. The no photo rule didn't stop me from trying to be all surreptitious of course, but the few shots I managed to sneak wound up coming out rather blurry and not worth keeping, because I was too busy looking around for the mean kling-on security guard. I did keep one or two photos, blurry and badly composed as they are. But I'll get to those in a minute. They had a ton of first edition science fiction classics in there that I would steal in a second. (Uh, if I did that sort of thing, which I don't.) By authors I had been sure that only I knew about. James Blish. Fritz Leiber. Theodore Sturgeon. Stanislaw Lem. Pierre Boulle, Robert Heinlein, Philip K. Dick. And... they were in places of honor. It was like heaven. They even had Iain M. Banks and Vernor Vinge, two of my more modern favorites, along with of course all the big easy ones. Asimov. Clarke. Niven. Anderson. A first edition of Childhood's End, (by Clarke) the first sci-fi novel to blow my mind and which made me ravenous for more. No Rudy Rucker though that I saw... a major oversight.

They had displays of movie items too, of course. Props from famous sci-fi movies and franchises; the dress that Sean Young wore in Blade Runner, a Storm Trooper armor suit, the original model of the Death Star used in Star Wars, (Where the no photo rule would have literally had me pulling out my hair, if I had any. As it was, I was in agony. The security ape would not leave! I think he was on to me.) the little talking bear from A.I., the Terminator robot, Robby the Robot. (Robby the freaking Robot!) Captain Kirk's command chair. Anybody recognize this?

Yes, that's right! It's the Pit Bull. Griff Tannen's anti-gravity skateboard from Back To The Future II. Totally. Sweet.

My favorite thing about the Sci-Fi Museum though is that, you know how in normal like, arty-farty museums, you'll see collections of snooty arty-farty junk, with little plaques next to them that say snooty stuff like "Kindly donated from the prestigious collection of Snooty McVandersnot"? Well, it's only at the Sci-Fi Museum that you'll find Star Wars action figures donated from the collection of Gus Lopez!

Yeah, it says "From the collection of Gus Lopez"... kind of hard to read, I know. But I had Had HAD to get this picture, and I was very nervous that that security clown was going to come around the corner before I got the chance. Plus the light was all dark and science fictiony. Oh well.

After the titillating thrill of the Science Fiction museum, the rest of Seattle rather paled. I re-visited Pike Place (I'd been there about 12 years ago on my way back from Alaska) and had a coffee at the original Starbuck's. I don't like Starbuck's coffee... too acidy. I like my coffee stronger and with the coffee machines having been cleaned out every once in a while. BUT, it's the very first Starbuck's coffee shop ever, it's a great success story, it was right there, and I am a traveling glory-hound, after all.

Oh sure, I did other stuff. I went up the Space Needle, rode a ferry from Bainbridge Island to Seattle, saw the world famous Giant Shoe Museum. Hell I even worked a little. But none of it is really as exciting as, well you know. That awesome genius science fiction museum, of course.

Jordan was kind enough to let me crash at his parent's house (they were on vacation) with him and Alison for a few nights, which saved me a few bucks on a hotel room. Very cool. Good to see them. When old Chiemseers get together, many tales of German hilarity along with German beer will inevitably flow. I flew out of Seattle on the 12th straight down to Fort Lauderdale Florida, where I am at the moment. Again for work. It's rather a hum-drum area... I've been here before, back in January. I just think it's neat I went from one corner of the continental US to the other. What a great job.

Oh, just in case not everybody has noticed, something else happened this past week which made me extreeeeemely happy: The military officer who arrested me in Iraq for being snotty to him found and commented on my blog! Specifically on the original post where I told that story. Nothing has made me that kind of happy for a really long time. You can read the post, his comment, and my response in the original spot, here. I really hope he comes back... unless he's going to arrest me for being snotty to him again of course. I won't be needing any more of that.

Shoes of Mystery? Sheesh.

Comments

[Sissy LouiseMarie Parker]

Wow! Awesome trip! I just read about the first Starbucks two days ago. I have one a block from my house and they have a bunch of promotional collateral about the history of the franchise, yadda, yadda. So that's cool that you were there while I was reading about it.

That museum sounds like it really rocks. The best museums I've been to are the Musee d'Orsay in Paris and the Mutter Museum in Philly.

At d'Orsay I touched the glass that encased Edgar Degas' Ballerina Bronze. I was frozen in time. Keyser actually left the building, smoked a cigar, and returned without me having moved from the case. I took a ton of flashless pics (permitted) which came out really well, but then I lost them!!!!

The Mutter Museum was just cool for the corpse factor. And the history of epidemics running rampant through society because there was a time we didn't understand the dangers of dumping sewage into the streets.

[messiestobjects]

Thanks Siss! It was a cool trip. I've been to the Louvre in Paris, but those kind of hoity toity places get on me after an hour or three. Plus that Mona Lisa bitch just sits there and stares at you all day.

I could've stayed in the Sci-Fi museum all day... Finally! A museum for me! A museum that speaks to me! I also really liked the Spy museum in Washington D.C. And pretty much any Science museum in general, especially those hands on ones where you can play with electricity and junk.

[Miss Luongo]

I like the cutting-edge visual art the best. I'm pretty sure those shows are put up for my pleasure. The 1999 Biennale in Venice was artopia (you know, art utopia). I prefer the highly competitive juried shows. They have the best variety of unusual stuff. Plus, they give you snacks if you go on the first day. And you can always wear black. See? What could be more perfect?

[messiestobjects]

There was something in the same building as the sci-fi museum called the Experience Music Project... I know you're not big on music in general, but it seemed pretty visually based. I didn't go in, even though the ticket included both museums, but if you'd have been there, I bet you'd have found it pretty fascinating.

I on the other hand love music in almost all of its forms (Rap and the Blues, yuck.) and for some reason, they blinded me with science fiction to the extent that it didn't even occur to me that I might want to check it out. They may need to rethink that whole museum combination; each subject elicits rabid fanaticism from it's fans, making it hard to enjoy both of them on the same day, apparently.

[Snooty McVandersnot]

"I don't like Starbuck's coffee... too acidy. I like my coffee stronger and with the coffee machines having been cleaned out every once in a while."

Starbucks cleans the coffee machines and lines constantly. They also throw out their old coffee every hour. I should know. I totally worked there a month and failed miserably to hack it.

[messiestobjects]

Actually, I'm beginning to think that I've misjudged Starbucks' coffee based on one or two miserable experiences. The first time I ever had a coffee from there was at one of their franchises in some shopping mall in Dubai. It was awful. That must be where my impression of their coffee as being acidy and old comes from. I think the only other time was someplace in Germany, and I may only have disliked it because the coffee in Germany in general is awesome; there is a Volkswagon plant in Columbia, so they tend to get first dibs on the best coffee imports from there, and Starbucks must have paled horribly in comparison.

The one I had at Pike Place, Seattle was good... but I chalked that up to it being the "real", original place. The other places on the same street all had great coffee, too.

But then... I forgot to have my morning coffee yesterday because I had a free day and I was in a hurry to get to the beach (I'm in Fort Lauderdale) and I developed a nagging headache that wouldn't go away during the course of the afternoon, and I realized it was caffeine deprivation. I only have one cup a day normally, but still, apparently the lack of that cup is enough. SO on the way back from the beach I swallowed my coffee pride and stopped in at Starbucks... I actually really enjoyed it! Perhaps the Top Pot glazed doughnut I got to go with it helped, but still. I actually found myself craving some today... I have to get my head around this shocking turn of events. Life as we know it is changed forever.

Or maybe they have some sort of magic coffee mojo hoodoo boodoo which they cast on all those who walk through the Pike Place entrance? Maybe it's still actually horrible crap, but I've been Starbucked?

[Miss Luongo]

You're so open-minded. Congratulations on overcoming your prejudices. Elitist superiority makes everything taste bitter and burned. Unless you're eating pate...it makes that taste delicious.

[messiestobjects]

But elitist superiority is what makes me feel better than everybody else! Hmm... I think I have to go back to hating Starbucks, otherwise my world will collapse.

[Emily]

Anyone that knows me, knows that I am the most level-headed and calm individual around. Your description is a damn lie. I'll make you pay for it someday.
Anyhow, it was good to see you!

[messiestobjects]

Oooohh, what are ya gonna do? Break the internet over my head? I'm reeaallly scared.

[messiestobjects]

Oh, I mean, good to see you too! Always fun to relive long gone Chiemsee memories... Actually what is kind of depressing about it in retrospect is that it sort of felt like a recent LOST episode... getting together with a few chums back from the island days, now in the hubbub of mainland life and all really wishing that we could get back there...